Last month I went on my first cruise as an adult to the Bahamas. And while I did have fun, I also discovered that cruise ships- like relationships, situationships, and other partnerships- are just not for me. Let me explain…
What I Loved:
The bars: frozen drinks galore! They had bars on every floor and every corner. I had at least one of every frozen concoction they had and even tried a few different cocktails. Every bar served different variations of daiquiris and other frozen fruity specialties. My favorites were a spicy mango pineapple daiquiri and a pink lemonade one. I also had a lovely raspberry mojito. If you plan on drinking heavily, then it’s best to gone head and pay for the three day drink ticket cause at $10 a drink, that shit adds up fast!
The food: You could eat all day long, including a 3 course sit down dinner to look forward to nightly. I pigged out on margarita pizza, panini turkey sandwiches, barbecue chicken, chicken tacos and burritos, salmon, and fries galore. Since I don’t eat pork or beef, breakfast was meatless, but I enjoyed fruit, pastries, grits, and other things. One morning the staff did bring me turkey bacon from the restaurant but it was so rubbery and looked undone that I declined. I am not a lover of pastries and cakes, but they had a smorgasbord of desserts and my son definitely took advantage lol.
Friendly staff and people: Everyone was so helpful and accommodating, which was great when I kept getting turned around and lost in the hallways of that big ass ship lol. The staff were all from different countries- Russia, Nigeria, China, India, the Caribbean, Italy, Cambodia and more. You could just tell they enjoyed their jobs and were happy to be there. I found out they work on the ship for nine months out of the year, take a break and then come back. I don’t think I could do that. I felt like I was the only adult there by myself- everyone else was coupled up or their with friends and family, but I talked to some of everybody and met people from Illinois, Alabama, South Carolina, Florida, Mississippi and other places around the country. I never ate or drank by myself, went to the club and comedy show with different people, chilled in the hot tub with others and felt very popular the whole time!
The waterslide: I rode the shit out of that water slide ok! I even convinced my son to get on it with me- which was hard cause he doesn’t like things he can’t control the first time out, but even he went back repeatedly lol.
Comfy bed and nice size bathroom: I was pleasantly surprised at how comfortable that small ass bed was in our stateroom! The mattress and pillow felt like I was floating on a marshmallow cloud in the sea, which was soothing. The bathroom included a sink and small shower with a detachable shower head that came in handy when I watched my hair. I just tried not to think of what happened to the waste every time my son and I flushed the toilet.
The club: Listen… I went to the club after the deck party expecting to laugh at how corny it would be…sheeeiit! That club was lit! It was hip hop night and EVERYBODY was on the dance floor including me, by myself. In the middle. Shaking my braids and splashin my drank to all the hits lol. I stayed until it shut down, got a slice of pizza and headed to my comfy marshmallow cocoon.
Daily activities: I did bring a big thick book with me, thinking I would chill in my room, or on deck and just kick back with drinks. Nah. Every night we were given an itinerary of things to do for the following day and night. There were live Hasbro board games, serious money making bingo tournaments, live entertainment including a Rock and Roll cover show and lounge music, a comedy show which was actual pretty funny and surprisingly racy (although it was 18+) and other stuff. They also had a basketball court, tennis, and golf and pools and hot tubs, which I spent lots of time in-drank in hand.
What I did not like:
Too many people: I learned that the Carnival Liberty is a cruise for first time travelers, families with small kids and ahem.. those on a budget. Hi. I learned that after talking to a few cruise vets that voiced their complaints about bad ass kids running every where stepping on toes and whatnot lol. I’m an empath and an introvert, constantly and consistently being around lots of different people with no real place to escape almost caused me to stay in my room. But since I was one of the people who booked on a budget- I’ll be damned if I was gonna stay locked up in that cabin. I just grinned and beared it. Especially when hot wet skinned strangers kept bumping into me.
The buffet closing early: The buffet served a great variety for breakfast, lunch and dinner, but there was so much to do on the ship that I lost track of time and damn missed out on it all. Luckily they did offer other things to eat (see above) but still…
The musical: Chile. Them folks couldn’t sing, could barely dance and I wiggled and giggled in my seat like a six year old as the performers belted out Americana classics like “Your the One that I Love”, “Living on A Prayer” and other hits. The costumes and actual theatrics made up for the shoddy performance and I was impressed by the simple, but very important to the production costumes to and quick changes on stage.
One day at sea: We sailed to Nassau, Bahamas, and while my son and I enjoyed our time off the ship shopping, walking, talking to the locals and swimming in the ocean, we felt rushed and wanted more time on land.
The ship was too damn big: For me personally, it tripped my head out how huge the ship was. Every time I went to a different place- the formal dining hall, the club, the area where the comedy club was, the huge theater, etc. It was so weird and freaky that all this stuff was on a ship. In the middle of the ocean. Just a sailing. With me on it. In the middle of the ocean! I felt claustrophobic and whatever the opposite of that is when there is too much space. Usually I am a heavy thinker, but I cut all that off cause I did not have time for my mind to start playing tricks on me. In the middle of the damn ocean!
The moving ship: I got seasick like a mf. Being in constant motion, even while eating and sleeping fucked with me and my stomach lol. On the day we arrived to Nassau and got off the boat I threw up three times. I got sick when we sailed back too and right before we boarded the plane to go home. I like to have my fun, being still and on land. And #dassit.
Black Girl Magic Everywhere
So yes, I enjoyed myself but preferred the time I spent on land and being physically in the water even more. We got off the ship to shop, my son was excited and so was I. This is the moment we had both been waiting for- him to buy souvenirs with money he had earned from having a great report card and me cause I wanted to swim in natural non-chlorinated water.
But as soon as I stepped off, I felt like my body was still moving. Not in a way where I was dizzy, it wasn’t that severe, it was way more subtle, but I immediately felt sick. To get on and off the boat you had to get in line, show your ID card and go through a metal detector. I desperately needed a bathroom and there were two slow moving people in from of me. I nervously and quietly asked for the nearest bathroom and no one could assist me.
All I had time to do was sweep my arm to clear my immediate area and weakly yell “Mooovvvee!!” Before blowing my cookies on the other side of the rope. I threw up everywhere- dramatically- but neatly cause I did have on white and didn’t want to take time away from land to go change. All eyes were on me and there were plenty of “Ewwws”, “Ughhhs”, “Wooows”, and “Oh mans”, but what the hell. It was embarrassing as shit, but I managed to find a bathroom, wiped myself up and went back out on the other side. I did not feel better but kept pushing on into town.
There were a few souvenir stands set up right outside of the port and Slim and I got stopped by a very excited young woman with a mouth full of gold teeth who liked my purple braids and gold accessories. We struck up a quick convo while she tried to get us to buy from her stand and she asked us where we were from. When I said Cleveland she went ballistic and started dancing and pointing to her shoes- a crisp pair of Lebron James and told me how much she loved him and Drake. Her enthusiasm was infectious and she took us over to another stall and introduced me to her girlfriend by saying, “This is my ol’ girl.” Ol’ girl did not like that at all and immediately started going off in their heavy accent. My new friend looked at me and desperately asked me to explain that she meant “ol’ girl” in the same way as Drake and not that she had a newer girlfriend, but ol girl wasn’t having it lol… Slim and I slowly backed away and left them in a domestic situation.
I felt weak in that staggering heat and had to sit down a few times to regain my composure and stopped in a Burger King bathroom to get myself together before we arrived at the Straw Market- a magnificent indoor flea market full of handmade mostly wooden crafts and souvenirs that the locals made right in front of you and sold for a very small price. I must have looked horrible and green at that point because one of the women walked over to me and immediately had me sit down at her stall in front of an industrial strength fan. She had another woman bring me a water bottle and paper towels to wipe up my now sweat soaked body and yet another one to rush me to the bathroom, where once again I let loose. “You are horribly seasick and a boat ride is not for you. Some people just can not do it,” she said in a clipped accent as a total of five women surrounded me in the sink area of the bathroom fanning me. I panicked about my son, but she assured me that he was ok back at the stall with “auntie”, which he was.
I explained to her that I just wanted to go to the beach and swim in the water. She agreed that would cool my body off and that she would make sure we went to “the best part of the beach for solitude cause that’s what I needed. How did she know? She called for two young girls to walk my son and I over to the city bus and I wondered how much it would cost because they were saying tourists were paying up to $15 and $30 for a cab ride and I would rather walk. She smiled, hugged us and said it was only $1.25 each! Slim and I jumped on that number ten bus so fast my head as spinning lol!
Now that ride to Junkanoo Beach was crazy! First of all the bus is like a van, small on the outside, but they put lots of chairs in there to hold a good number of passengers- and the seats all had foldout seats so it tripled the number of people who could fit in there. They drive on the left side and I don’t recall seeing any stop signs or traffic lights and it was very stop and go in heavy traffic. Lots of yelling out the window, near swipes and misses- which seemed normal to the other passengers, since I was the only one clutching my pearls lol. And the bus never fully stopped. Like if people needed to get on they would run across, the door would open and they would literally hop on. They would call out their stops and the bus would slow down and they would jump off. I whispered to the elder lady next to me that I wasn’t sure I could do all that and did she think he might make a complete stop for me and my son? She laughed and said yes he would. And everybody was singing along to Bahamian covers of American R&B songs like John Legend’s “All of Me.” I was singing along too until I noticed that we had been riding for more than ten minutes and were passing up all of the tourists parts of the beach with all those rental cabins and huge groups of people. I got curious, but the older lady told me he was taking us to the best part- local part of the beach, and sure enough once we arrived another ten minutes later, there weren’t that many people in the area and I was thankful.
We paid our fare, learned the bus ran every ten minutes and went off into the beach. I magically felt better than ever as soon as my body hit the water! I got my black Ariel on and swam and played in the water, talked to a few locals, watched a group of guys shoot a music video, played in the sand and had a great time for hours! Then it was time to get out and find our way back to the boat. I stepped up out the water and hurled again- inside the water, much to my and Slim’s disgust. Really it was just stomach acid and nothing else by that point, but after that I did feel better. Third time’s a charm I guess lol.
We made our way back into to the town and went back to the Straw Market where we purchased more trinkets that we didn’t want to carry to the beach with us. Of course we mostly purchased from the stalls of the women who had tended to me and they tried to offer us deals, but me and Slim payed the full price (still inexpensive) as appreciation cause they did not have to treat me with such kindness.
Out of the whole trip, that day and entire scene stood out the most to me. When all those ladies- complete strangers on a foreign island- stood around fanning me in that bathroom, I was overwhelmed with emotion. I was just another face of a thousand that they see on a daily basis coming to their land, but they treated me like I was a long lost niece of theirs. Black girl magic extends across the Americas, across the seas, islands and territories and is everywhere. And for that I was grateful.
I do wish I had taken more photos, but I was too busy having fun to do so. Although I did purchase the social media WiFi package that gave me access to my Facebook, Instagram and Twitter pages, I barely used it and didn’t post anything at all. It may sound like I didn’t have fun being on the boat, but I actually did. I’m just not sure if I would get on a boat again lol.
The FlyGirl Chronicles 
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